Rooftop Tents for Dogs & More Great April Fool’s ‘Products’

Ah, April 1. The day that brings a little levity to our mornings each year. We’ve rounded up our favorite brand and gear spoofs for us all to enjoy.

Kelty ‘Cheeky Dozen’ Camp Bench

Colorful, cuddly, and oh-so-sturdy, a good camp chair is a basecamp essential. And while plenty of one-person chairstwo-person lovesseats, and even a three-person camp couch exist, Kelty has outdone themselves with this piece of camp furniture — one for the whole family, whether you have five kids or 10!

On April 1, Kelty is proud to introduce its “Cheeky Dozen” Camp Bench, new for spring, and may we say, just in time for our staff-wide camping trip we’ve been planning!

The only con? You’ll get a camp chair for 12, but only two cupholders.

RoofNest Pup-Up Tent

Roofnest dog rooftop tent
(Photo/Roofnest)

Roofnest’s latest entry to the elevated tent market is a scaled-down version of the brand’s Sparrow pop-up rooftop tent. The luxed-out, 16-square foot interior could accommodate one large, two medium, or three little good boys or girls if it existed.

Constructed using recycled chew toys (allegedly), the Pup-Up rooftop tent for dogs ($4,122 MSRP) takes relentless aim at the wallets of childless millennials everywhere. And before you go clutching pearls with sticker shock, understand that with Roofnest, you’re getting much more than just another pet tentOK?

Included with this 60-pound, totally justifiable “investment?” One dog mattress, a food bowl, chew toy and doggy gear storage, a window awning, a mounting kit, and, the piece de resistance — one very old tennis ball.

So…why are you still here? Go on, git over to Roofnest and place your order so that you might revel in the knowledge that out of all the other 10-year REI members, you are the superior pet parent.

ORVIS Human Bed

Let’s face it. $300 for a dog bed is a little insane. But to play devil’s advocate, really, can you put a price on your dog’s happiness? The same applies to humans — don’t suffer an uncomfortable bed when you don’t have to.

Almost the inverse of what RoofNest is doing for pets, ORVIS is doing for humans — solving the problem of ultimate comfort for all you pup parents. The new Orvis Huma-Rest is engineered and calibrated for the human body, made with Orthopedic memory foam, a plush top, luxurious upholstery, and modular, packable features. For more than 40 years, Orvis has been making cozy dog ​​beds.

And finally, you can enjoy them too.

Granite Gear x Kula Cloth Crown 3-P Pack

granite gear kula cloth pack

An interesting improvement on Granite Gear’s Crown 2 Packis Granite Gear’s Crown 3-P.

The backpack brand teamed up with pee-cloth maker Kula Cloth to create this Limited Edition “Go Where You Gotta Go” Crown3-P Pack, made from reused Kulas and Granite Gear’s undyed fabric color, which reduces the pack’s water waste in the manufacturing process by 55 percent.

Why sew a pee cloth into a pack, you ask? Granite Gear’s 3-P means you can enjoy easy access to your pee cloth AND maximize efficiency on the trail. “Simply relieve yourself, then wipe on your pack!” explained the brand.

Each new Crown3-P ClothPack is made of 53 antimicrobial Kulas and high-tenacity yarn, and testers have estimated that the pack holds 10x its weight in body fluid. Shop the new Granite Gear pack online today.

mountainFLOW Marijuana Bike Wash

mountainflow eco bike wash and degreaser

Coming off the success of their Beer-Flavored Mustache Wax, launched on April 1 last year, mountainFLOW is proud bring to market maybe its most innovative outdoor product yet — a bike wash with a little somethin’ special added.

mountainFLOW, a company known for their award-winning plant-based bike lube and wash, announced that they are launching a line of bike wash + degreaser that contains marijuana.

“When consumers hear “Colorado” and “plant-based” they assume that weed is involved, and now they’re 100% right,” wrote the brand. The new bike wash contains marijuana, specifically terpenes from cannabis, and CBG, a CBD derivative. mountainFLOW partnered with Colorado Springs bike shop and CBD purveyor, Twisted Spoke to honey in the formula.

essentially, mountainFLOW’s 2-in-1 Bike Wash and Degreaser (which retails for $4.20) now also has the added benefit of mellowing out your bike.

Nikwax Diagnostic Waterproofing

Nikwax_AFD

Ever wondering when exactly you should retire your gear? Or, re-apply your shell’s waterproofing? Nikwax came out swinging today with the perfect solution.

The new experiential Aqua Forensic Device (AFD) will “help customers identify their waterproofing needs” while providing retailers with an experiential draw (look for it in your nearest REI soon).

The mobile AFD provides 3D cameras, as well as water jet spray heads situated around the interior of the enclosed booth. The user enters wearing the gear they wish to test. After using the touchscreen to enter information about their item, including type of gear, brand, and age, the booth selects the correct spray height and strength, performs a diagnostic spray, and poof! Results are instant, and the correct Nikwax products are then dispensed from the attached vending unit.

We don’t know about you, but this sounds like the diagnostic gear tool we all need.

Giant Loop Keg Kaddy Party Panniers

Giant Loop Keg Kaddy Party Panniers

Giant Loop claims it “has responded to thousands of rider requests” with the introduction of its new Keg Kaddy Party Panniers. Pour yourself a frosty cold beverage from the tap at the end of every day’s adventure with the world’s first integrated solar-powered refrigeration system cooling a fully-sized 15.5-gallon keg kept fresh with carbon dioxide injection.

While we’re not sure how we feel about the 305 motorcycle add-on, it does sound nice to rock a propane barbecue grill. And the brand claims it even balances the weight for “optimal off-road performance and handling.”

The Keg Kaddy comes with Giant Loop logo tap handles, a built-in cup dispenser, and hot and cold storage to keep foods fresh for up to five days. And just in case any revelers indulge in “one too many,” a breathalyzer disables the motorcycle’s ignition system if the rider’s blood alcohol level exceeds legal limits.

For riders who want to party like it’s 1999, Giant Loop’s new Keg Kaddy Party Panniers (GL part #KKPP) are priced affordably at just $2,999.99, including solar panels, CO2 and propane tanks, and barbecue. BMW Motorcycle Owners Association members qualify for special pricing. Keg Kaddy Party Panniers are available exclusively at www.giant-loop.com.


From all of us at GearJunkie, Happy April Fool’s!

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